Birth stories are always interesting to hear. Everyone has a different story which is so cool! No two stories are alike which makes the whole birth process elusive and difficult to really grasp in your mind.
When I got pregnant with Baby Boy, my first thought was not, “I’m going to try for a natural birth.” I am a healthy person by nature, eating my fair share of fruits and vegetables, but I didn’t think I could be as crazy as having my child without pain meds. In fact, it hadn’t crossed my mind to have a natural child. But, when I had decided to do it, I quickly learned…
A successful natural birth happens BEFORE the delivery room
If I had not been prepared BEFORE I got to the delivery room, I don’t believe I could have gone through labor naturally. Now, nothing REALLY prepares you for your first birth, but here are just some tidbits I learned along the way.
Sidenote: Now, as I write this post, I feel hesitant. I am hesitant because I in NO way mean for this to come across as the “right” way. I want you to know that HOWEVER you choose (or didn’t get to choose) to birth your baby, that is the right way. A healthy baby is the ultimate goal. Births don’t EVER go according to a plan, and I just write about what helped me through this whole process in hopes that you can glean something from it…or not. But, if you continue, I thank you for reading anyway 🙂
1. I decided BEFORE labor that I would have a natural birth.
The first step is to announce it out loud. It sounds crazy, but the more you speak something into existence, the truer it becomes. I physically mouthed the words out loud. Because, as I learned, birth is a mental game of keeping your mind full of positive affirmations to be able to endure what is happening to your body. If I had not mentally prepared telling myself I could do this, I could not have gone through with birth naturally. I knew my body was MADE to handle this. That pain, in this instance, was actually OK. Mind-blowing, I know. That pain can actually be a GOOD thing.
Help yourself believe you can do it. And you can, mama! Childbirth will be tough, no matter how you slice it. I had decided in my head BEFORE going into labor that having a natural birth was what I wanted. Then people who know you are going to have a natural birth can encourage you, and not tell you horror stories of their birth. So, determine you will have a natural birth, and hold to it! And this brings me to my next item.
2. I educated myself on labor and delivery.
Now, I admit I am a Googler. I’m not proud of it, but if something odd happens, I’m asking Google to tell me all about it. And it’s not always the best decision to Google something instead of taking an actual class. So instead of just reading blurbs online and calling myself educated, I decided to take a little more action toward my education.
A course I HIGHLY recommend is the online Mama Natural course. Genevieve and a certified midwife lead you through everything you could possibly encounter in birth. They begin at the beginning of your pregnancy journey and lead you all the way to the end: birthing the…well, I’ll just say things happen even after the baby has arrived!
Birth is no joke, so I suggest taking some type of class! Whether at the hospital, in someone’s house, or at your own home, learn from someone who is certified in what they are teaching. Did you know there are three stages of birth, and Transition is the MOST intense, but it doesn’t last for very long? Learn what happens physically to your body as you go through the different stages. Learn what your options are for induction, breaking your water, vitamin K shots, etc. This is all part of educating yourself.
3. I hired a doula.
My mother said it best when she said, “There are doulas, and then there’s Meg.” Imagining birth without Meg was like backpacking in the desert without a camelback: you suffer and almost die (figuratively with birth, of course). Her encouragement, honesty, and knowledge all helped me understand and grasp what labor could look like (if a first-time mom could ever know what it might be like). Her confidence let me know that she was not going to let me fail, and in turn, I would not let her fail.
Meg signed us up (she, my husband, and I) for a natural birth course called Mama Natural. Any question I had, Meg would answer it. And I had a LOT of questions
Well before active labor, I knew Meg was on my team. I could ask any question, make any remark, say anything about birth, and she would help me understand it. Meg would light up when she spoke about birth and what we could do to prepare for it. Meg was the secret sauce behind the husband and wife team. She was the natural epidural I needed to feel like I could even accomplish a natural birth despite doubts.
Throughout my whole labor, she put everything she had into getting me to the home plate, sacrificing her own plans and schedule to make sure all of my needs were met. There is something very special about having your own team to cheer you on; you all have this strong connection that you share and never tire talking about.
The best decision I made was hiring a doula.
My water didn’t naturally break. Instead of having the doctor just do it for me, Meg helped me get mentally prepared for what was to come next. She then helped navigate my body around the room when I could barely move my own legs. Then my husband quickly learned and jumped on board, and he was able to help me as well! My doula was also great at reading my face and immediately intervened when she saw me getting defeated.
If you aren’t able to hire a doula, try to have someone in the room who is going to be your advocate: a person who knows what to do when the (pardon me) sh*t hits the fan (and it probably will). You need someone you trust who is FOR the way you want birth to go; to help decipher the mumbo jumbo doctors and nurses sometimes talk about literally over your head. A doula will know the medical jargon and help you determine if a decision is imminent or if you have a few minutes.
4. I did something active almost every single day.
In the beginning, when I found out I was pregnant with Sam, I had visions of eating chips and chocolate on the couch. Anyone else? And, sure, it was fun lounging on the couch, eating all the sweet and salty snacks, especially after a long day on my feet. But I quickly learned that birth was going to be a marathon for which I needed to train. Now was not the time to quit my workout routine. In fact, I aimed, no matter how I was feeling, to do something to raise my heart rate almost every single day.
If you didn’t have a workout routine, now is definitely the time to start! You can start with something as simple as walking around the neighborhood. Do some squats, lunges, do whatever you can to get your heart pumping. It doesn’t need to be an intense kickboxing class, but something that requires your heart to work a little bit. You will need that endurance for the delivery room. Whether 10 hours or 36 hours or even longer, you want to have the stamina to outlast those contractions! Because even after your contractions have opened you up, then pushing comes. And you want to be ready for it.
5. I gave myself grace.
One thing I was learning that seemed to be a common theme about labor and delivery: births NEVER go according to plan. I had to mentally prepare for when my birth “plan” didn’t play out. And I needed to be ok when my birth plan failed. So I continued to hold loosely to my birth “plans” and cling tightly to the One who was forming this human inside of me.
The main goal of labor and delivery is a healthy baby. Sometimes things out of our control occur causing a change in plans. You want the best for your child, and the best is what will happen because you have a caring birth team that will take care of you and baby. So soak up all the abundant grace and enjoy the gifts that God has given to you.
Bottom Line
If you are pregnant, you will birth a baby. And you will be a rockstar for it. Period. No matter HOW you choose (or again don’t get to choose) to birth your sweet babe. There is so much emotion around birth in general. You are getting to meet and hold this special human…to finally see the tiny face who’s been jabbing you in the ribs the past 9 months 😉
If you’ve EVER thought of having a natural birth, you can totally do it, and I hope something from here helps. It’s such an exciting process that I will feel blessed to do it again, God willing. If you want to read my birth story, you can check it out here!
Let me know if you would add anything else to this list! I wish you the best, mama!
