In a constant battle of valleys and hills, I was skeptical at first going to the “Come to the Table Tour,” thinking I wouldn’t glean much from this night, but I was sorely wrong. There was so much to learn. I was filled to the brim on this wonderful night of fellowship and worship, and I was blown away by the Holy Spirit’s presence in each speaker. Literally. He spoke straight to my heart.
An author I know and love, Annie F. Downs, preached on this verse:
Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy. He who goes out weeping, carrying seed to sow, will return with songs of joy…
Psalm 126:5-6
And I began to think.
Our God is the God of hills and valleys. He resides with us always: rejoicing with us as we lift our arms in praise on the hills and holding our tears as we descend into the valleys. Life is a constant series of hills and valleys; the lessons we learn and the way we react is telling of how big we think God is.
What Happens on The Mountain Top
After what felt like an eternity in the valley of Postpartum Blues, I was entering the tippy top of the mountain. I began to feel the joy of motherhood and to see my sweet little boy interact with me. On this mountain top the fog clears, the darkness lifts, and all of a sudden, I feel a weight lift. I feel much freer than I have felt in a while.
But with this freedom comes independence, and I begin to depend on my own eyes, looking every way I want to look. In the valley, where I once was blind, I had to depend on God, seek God, CLING to Him with every fiber of my being. Now, venturing into a high season, I let go of God’s hand ever so slightly with each step I take out of the valley. I begin to think, Ok, I’ve got this now. You can go do you, God. I know you have bigger things to worry about than littl ol’ me. I’ve got me now. I’ve got me under control.
How Quickly I Forget
And then my eyes grow wide. Had I so quickly forgotten how deep the valley was? How high the edges were? How dark the moments of sadness were? That when I go back into the valley again–because we know life is a series of hills and valleys–I think I will be able to rely on my own strength? Do I want it to just be ME in the valley?
I am so quick to dismiss God, forget
Lean in Hard to Him
I’m not saying I want to be kept in the valley and that I just love going through difficult stuff. But there is something very significant and special happening in the valley. The sowing of tears happens in the valley. Poured out into the ground all around you, so that when the time to reap comes (and I promise, friend, it will come), great beautiful flowers of Joy will bloom all around you.
What your heart pours out in the valley, it reaps on the mountain: a great harvest of joy. All the tears you have cried, prayers you have prayed, the down-on-your-knees BEGGING God to please bring you out of the valley and up the mountain are not wasted. He’s with you, making a way, blazing a trail through the forest; cutting rock and stone so that you both can rejoice at the top. And it is in these moments that I thank God for the deepest of deep because they bring me the closest of close to Him.
Prayer
Dear Heavenly Father, I confess I tend to forget what it felt like in the valley. And then I grow fearful thinking you have left me on the mountain. But I can rejoice in knowing you are with me always. You go before me and hem me in from behind. Thank you that the deepest of valleys do not separate me from You, and the tears I sow in the valley are not forgotten. They will reap an even greater harvest of joy. In your son’s name, I pray, Amen.
Your Turn
Friend, are you on a mountain right now? Reaping the great joy sown in the valley? Would you share your encouraging story in the comments below so that others can celebrate with you? And if you are in the valley, just know that what you are sowing in tears, you will reap in great joy.
