Social distancing has turned to social isolation. Suicidal rates have increased. We continue to place our hope in instant gratification, on the things we can see, on the most important items in front of us. Our thoughts stay where they originated–in our heads–because we have no community with which to talk. We have become distressed, deprived, and dismayed people.
And rightly so. Circumstances in 2020 haven’t changed. We are still in a pandemic. Hesitant about meeting together in person, we are lonely and frightened that this might be what our lives will look like until…no one really knows.
I find myself in a pattern of hopefulness, followed by sadness. The pendulum swings violently this way and that. Although current situations have not changed (we are still quarantining, wearing masks, social distancing, Zooming like it’s our job), I feel Hope surround me. A peaceful whisper bubbles up in my heart, asking me to join in the joy, and making the corners of my mouth twitch upright.
But when I look at the news or hear of others’ pain, sadness takes control of the emotional wheel.
Something has to change.
A question arises: In what am I placing my hope?
Am I placing my hope in how events will “work themselves out” how I think they should go? Or is my hope in God himself? The only true, constant hope we really have?
When I place my hope in the former and not the latter, my faith runs dry. My world is easily crushed when my hope is found in the festive decorations I see on social media or in the holiday activities that we won’t be participating in this year. Becoming blatantly obvious, I see the things that have been taken away from me. And my mood suddenly changes from joyful to annoyed. Carefully crafted holiday routines are ruined. And I feel the loss like a child uncovering the truth of Santa Claus. The holiday season becomes a farce and a scam.
Distractions from the day blind my outlook on life. Grace-filled scenarios quickly dissolve to grace-void.
In the most simple terms, I am happiest when I have done everything on my to-do list, my house is clean and tidy (well, from an outsider’s view ;), and I have a plan for what we will do or where we will go for the day. I feel most defeated when everything doesn’t go in the way I intended. Or when I have to pivot my original plans. These are minor examples where my hope is placed in my current circumstances.
My focus is not on the eternal: trusting in God and what he provides.
There are much larger scenarios where the pendulum swings between confidence in God and feeling abandoned. Deciding we were ready for children, my husband and I didn’t expect the outcome: two back-to-back miscarriages. My devastation trampled my hope in God leaving me empty.
But God never left me.
He continued to send me helpers to dig my way out of the hole that had been created by these miscarriages.
Hope lived on through the wreckage, and my tender heart learned to feel again despite the horrible events that had occurred.
It’s difficult not to chuck the rest of 2020 in the trash. To numb our hearts and minds, forcing ourselves to just “get through” the rest of the year. We can run blindly toward 2021 and feel like we missed nothing from 2020. With the holiday season now upon us, part of me is excited but the other part, the realistic part, is apathetic toward what this holiday season holds.
Jon Collins, the co-founder of The Bible Project, spoke about his personal story of hope in an interview.
He was at the pinnacle of his career, getting ready to sell two of his own very successful Silicone Valley companies. He was on the precipice of making a lot of money. Then, he thought, he could finally do something he loved and not worry about money.
Of course, God had other plans.
When it came time to actually sell his companies, the company stock had plummeted. He was not going to obtain the nest egg for which he had originally hoped. As he was starting to panic, he heard a quiet voice.
God spoke to him and asked, “Jon, what’s the worst that could happen?”
As Jon went through scenario after scenario of worst-case events, God challenged him with a question that challenges my own thinking.
God asked Jon if your “worst-case” scenario happens, will you still be happy and trust me?
This question stops my ever-wandering mind and becomes the epitome of our hope in God and who we ultimately trust.
Will we allow our hope to be subdued by the light of this world or illuminated by the light of heaven?
Wow. I look up towards the sky and smile slightly outwardly, but my heart beams within.
If we believe that God is in control and if we believe that our hope is eternal and not just for this day, then the answer is obvious to the question “will you still be happy and trust me?”
A resounding “Yes, Lord! Yes! We DO trust you. And we are happiest when you are closest and we are deeply rooted on the rock of Jesus.” Whether storms or rainbows, whether droughts or rainforests, whether valleys or mountains, we will only be happy when we are trusting and hoping in God.
Why?
Because he is the author and perfecter of our faith (Hebrews 12:1-3). He plans the paths that we will walk (Proverbs 16:9). He knows our soul to the deepest depths, far better than we could ever know ourselves, and gives us exactly what we would have asked for if we knew what God knew (Dr. Timothy Keller). He is our Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6). He is our everything. We would be nothing to him except for the fact that he loves us so much.
So, will our circumstances change dramatically from now until the new year?
Probably not.
And I don’t say this to discourage you or me but wrestle with this straightforward yet provoking question. If nothing changes for the foreseeable future, if we are still trudging along in a world-wide pandemic in 2021, will we be happy and trust in our constant Heavenly Father (Read more about our Heavenly Father here)?
Will we place our hope in God eternal and not in the hopes of fleeting traditions and holiday activities? Will our hope be found in the Everlasting Father or in circumstances we can’t control?
Our hope is perpetual, and it endures all hardships. So yes, let’s place our hope in God. We can find our peace in his word and His promises. And this is where our soul will rest from now until the end of this pandemic and even until we come face to face with our maker.
Your Turn
Friend, do you find that your joy is hiding this holiday season? Do you find, in this troublesome season, that your hope is diminishing?
None of us have ever experienced a season quite like this one. In this holiday season, maybe you need to wrestle with that question: will you be happy and trust me? I am so grateful Jon shared this part of his story so that we can all think about this question of where our true hope is found.
My prayer for you is that your heart will speak, however quietly, yes. Yes, Lord. My hope is in you and nothing else (Psalm 39:7).
Prayer
Dear God, we are so thankful for a power greater than our own, which holds our best interest at heart. We praise you, not because you give us everything we want or shield us from misfortune, but that you never leave us. You are giving us grace in this pandemic. Father, if there is nothing else we learn from 2020, let it be that we trusted you entirely. When we had nothing left to give, let us remember that you were still faithful. As 2020 comes to an end, I pray for you to be known in every part of my life, for a kind and generous mindset for all during this time, and a heart full of eternal hope. We love you, Lord. In Jesus’ precious name, we pray, Amen.
